This is a card of…

Anxiety

Nightmares

Worry

Trepidation

Insomnia

“Ultimately, anxiety creates stagnancy. What’s the solution? Speak the truth even if it scares you. Be authentic.”

-Deborah Bravandt

The Nine of Swords is about the very real feeling of imagined pain: pain we remember, pain we anticipate, pain we want to spare a loved one. Anxieties and worst-case scenarios cycle endlessly through our mind, keeping us from experiencing the moment we are actually living.

A dark night of the soul confronting our own vulnerabilities and fears can be an important springboard for growth, but in this Nine we have turned it into a hamster wheel of self-blame and anguish. We are utterly alone in our suffering, because we are creating it. We cover our eyes (and possibly our ears) so we can focus on the worst possibilities. We need to take our hands from our face and look at the tough but manageable moment that is right now.

Are we feeling this way because we wronged someone or behaved badly? Apologize. Are we expecting the worst because things have gone so poorly in the past? The past is over, look at the present with clear eyes. Is it because the situation really is grim? Take whatever small steps you can to mitigate it. Can you not bear how someone else is suffering? Bear it, commit to being strong and positive for their sake. No matter how difficult the task may seem, it is not impossible.